well...
I'm tired of feeling. I think I have been for a while. I'm honestly not sure of the last time I really felt something. (aside from love... but I couldn't tell you if that was forced)
I don't know if I actually feel hurt or if my mind just beileves that I should feel that.
My mind thinks that my heart deserves hurt, I suppose.

but honestly I don't know what I should do. I think it woul dbe healthy for me to turn my emotions off... (which is what I've been trying to do. my mind, I'd like to think, is smarter than this.
but its played tricks on me before


how do I really feel???? I couldn't fucking tell you. I think I feel unhappy? but is it because I'm actually feeling heartbroken? or is this something I'm forcing on myself?

I think I'm lost *in* my mind...